Want to Be More Influential? Improve Your Social Skills

Dale Carnegie got it right when he said that to win more friends and influence more people you need to improve your interpersonal skills. Twenty years of research on power and influence shows that people with superior social skills are substantially more influential than people with average social skills. These findings make sense when you realize that influence is not something you have; it’s something other people give you. In other words, you can’t be influential with people unless they allow you to be influential with them. So influence is in large part a function of your relationship with other people, and the rule of thumb on influence is that you are likely to be more successful if the people you want to influence know you, like you, respect you, and trust you.

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About Terry R. Bacon

Terry R. BaconI am a Scholar in Residence in the Korn/Ferry Institute.  I am also president of the board of Music in the Mountains, a summer classical music festival in Durango, Colorado.  For three weeks every summer, Music in the Mountains offers more than forty concerts featuring world-class musicians and sponsors a classical music conservatory.  And I am chairman of the Fort Lewis College Foundation board.  As our mission statement says, the foundation's purpose is to "enrich educational and cultural opportunities at Fort Lewis College by encouraing and stewarding gifts for scholarships, programs and facilities--wise investments in the leaders of tomorrow."   I also serve on the advisory boards of the Durango Arts Center and Friends of the Fort Lewis College Theatre.

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Inside Elements of Influence

  • Part I: Getting Others to Follow Your Lead
  • Chapter 1: Fundamentals of Influence
  • Chapter 2: The Ways and Means of Influence
  • Part II: Ethical Influence Techniques
  • Chapter 3: Let Me Explain
  • Chapter 4: Believe Me
  • Chapter 5: Finding Common Ground
  • Chapter 6: What Do You Think?
  • Chapter 7: Finding Inspiration
  • Chapter 8: Increasing Your Impact
  • Part III: The Dark Side of Influence
  • Chapter 9: I Would Prefer Not To
  • Chapter 10: There’s a Sucker Born Every Minute
  • Chapter 11: Winning Through Intimidation
  • Chapter 12: Making an Offer They Can't Refuse

Inside Elements of Influence

  • Part I: Getting Others to Follow Your Lead
  • Chapter 1: Fundamentals of Influence
  • Chapter 2: The Ways and Means of Influence
  • Part II: Ethical Influence Techniques
  • Chapter 3: Let Me Explain
  • Chapter 4: Believe Me
  • Chapter 5: Finding Common Ground
  • Chapter 6: What Do You Think?
  • Chapter 7: Finding Inspiration
  • Chapter 8: Increasing Your Impact
  • Part III: The Dark Side of Influence
  • Chapter 9: I Would Prefer Not To
  • Chapter 10: There’s a Sucker Born Every Minute
  • Chapter 11: Winning Through Intimidation
  • Chapter 12: Making an Offer They Can't Refuse